As I sat back and watched the bus pick up Stephen from the end of the driveway, I am reminded of my day on school buses. I always swore up and down that my children would never ride buses after what I endured on them, but here I am kissing my kids goodbye and sending them out into this dangerous world. I know I can't shelter them forever. As a midwife I saw plenty of newlyweds who lived their entire lives sheltered and protected from "the real world." Their abilities to cope with struggle, hardship and pain amazed me. They weren't "tainted" or beaten down by life. You could truly see God in their eyes and hearts.
Our kids aren't quite as demure and quiet, so I know their time is coming. We have to arm them with knowledge and love of God. Our kids are to be soldiers for The Kingdom, not the quiet servants working in the shadows. This is already apparent in our dealings with the schools thus far.
Our children have been very prayerful since beginning school. Even when we get to bed late due to evening activity outside of the home, reports, studying or homework, they never miss their prayers. I am the lazy one. I am the one who gets to be giddy I am so tired and I just crash into bed! I have been chastised by one priest and this constantly sits in my mind and eats away at me until I summon up some energy to climb the steps to bless each of my children before climbing back into bed.
Stephen, my future priest or prophet, we aren't sure admitted that his night trauma had ended. Ever since we blessed his room, placed a rosary next to his bed and looked the other way when he acquired my scapular for himself, he has stopped being awakened in the middle of the night by evil spirits. He has been tormented since he was little and we just thought he was having bad dreams until I met someone very special who shared with me that these may not be nightmares at all, but evil spirits tormenting his soul when he is at his most vulnerable. The devil is actively seeking out our children...as anyone can plainly see by watching the news. Stephen did finally tell us just a few months ago that he didn't think they were dreams at all.
Last week, while he was playing he casually mentioned how he gets pictures in his head of things that haven't happened yet...all the time. He didn't know all the right words, but Paul and I got the idea. I asked him what he meant (we were sitting on the floor putting together blocks, not even sitting eye to eye). He talked about getting pictures in his head about camping with dad and seeing some rocks..very descriptively told me what they looked like and how they were laying on the ground, then two weeks later he did in fact go camping with dad and saw the same thing "from the picture in my head." I would love to know what else he sees!
He seems to also have a great appreciation for what sin is and what it does to our Lord. He comes home in tears when he hears the name of the Lord cast in vain, lying, etc. We offer prayers for his friends who persecute him and call him names (funny he still calls them friends even when they are teasing him or picking on him), as well as teachers, the principal and others who he hears committing sin. When I made a comment about this to Paul out loud, Katherine commented that she prays all day long because of what she hears at her high school. So for as much as I feel like a failure as a good Catholic wife and mother, sometimes I get glimmers that I did something right :)
Well, this posting was a lot longer than I anticipated, so I'd better cut out so I can get ready for school. A tornado looks like it blasted thru my house and I am not a good thinker if I have to sit in chaos!
Christmas letters go out this week!
Kris
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